It’s ok not to feel ok
Whether your pregnancy was planned or unplanned, it’s natural to have mixed emotions about it. You may swing from excited to worried, or happy to sad and back again. Pregnancy hormones such as oestrogen and progesterone can contribute to giving you this mix of emotional highs and lows, especially in the first three months.
Having a baby changes everything and it’s very common to worry about the future. Many women ask themselves questions like:
• How will I cope with giving birth?
• Will my baby be OK?
• Will I be a good mother?
• Will this change my relationship with my partner?
• How will we manage for money?
• Can I go back to work or education afterwards?
• Will I still have a life of my own?
• Will a previous pregnancy problem happen again?
• Will something that I’ve done/eaten/drunk harm the baby?
How your changing body affects your feelings
Pregnancy changes your body, which can also affect how you feel. Some women love the physical experience of being pregnant and feel strong and positive. Others don’t enjoy pregnancy or like the way they look and feel. For example, you may have concerns about how much weight you’re putting on and how long it will take to lose it. Or you may be feeling sick or tired, which can all make you feel fed up.
Try not to be too hard on yourself. We are constantly bombarded with seemingly perfect images of happy, healthy women having the time of their lives during pregnancy in glossy magazines and on social media. But the reality is often very different. Not everyone enjoys how pregnancy affects their body and makes them feel.
It’s natural to feel a bit anxious about how pregnancy will change your body. But it’s important to ask for help if you are having negative feelings that won’t go away or that are too much to cope with. Talk to your midwife or doctor if you have any concerns or worries about your changing body.
Sex, pregnancy and your emotions
It’s completely natural for your sex drive to change during pregnancy. Some women enjoy having sex while they’re pregnant and others don’t. This can sometimes cause anxiety for couples, especially if one of you wants to have sex and the other doesn’t.
Talk to your partner if you are worried about your sex life. It may help you both if you can talk about your feelings about sex, how they’ve changed and why. Talking together now can give both of you the chance to air any concerns or worries you may have. You may be able to defuse any tension and reassure each other. You may also be able to find other ways of being intimate with each other that doesn’t involve sex. You can also talk to your midwife if you have any concerns about sex during or after pregnancy.
Please don’t hesitate to reach out to your midwife and who would happily help you in a heart beat with any questions you have or any concerns you have.
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